Respectful Communication Reaches Past Common Barriers
No matter if you’re attempting to communicate with a snotty-nosed toddler or a distracted teenager, the wall between you can seem six feet thick.
A powerful tool to break through communication barriers is simply to give up your pursuit of being the greatest public speaker or the most impacting lecturer. Rather, learn to acknowledge how your child functions and understand what really makes them tick.
Knowing Your Child’s Communication Style is Vital
Effective parenting means grasping what respectful communication truly is.
Firstly, it’s vital for you to “get” your child. Know how they learn and understand things. Especially when it comes to conversing.
For example, do they feel more comfortable when you pass the figurative mic back and forth in conversation? Or do they need a slower pace than Gilmore Girls-style rapid fire? Perhaps, they’re also turned off by questions?
Reaching them on their level will help you connect. Plus, it’s respectful communication at its finest.
“Everyday” Moments Bridge Gaps
As mentioned before, effective parenting isn’t all about being the greatest public speaker or lecturer. More than anything, it’s learning to make the seemingly insignificant moments significant.
For example, consider the small little rituals your family has such as homework time, mealtime, bedtime, etc. A lot of information can be transferred during these moments. And, it feels natural.
Use these times to bridge the gaps, connecting deeper with your child.
Furthermore, it’s during these times that you tend to talk about trivial information. Which is great because children live on that superficial and trivial plane.
So, to practice respectful communication, keep asking them about insignificant details. Eventually, the in-depth stuff is going to slip out or bubble up. And, to be an effective parent, these details are necessary.
Clear Boundaries Establish Personal Space and Promote Maturity
This idea of having personal boundaries has become increasingly popular in the modern world. From your boss, in-laws, or even toxic friends—there’s a notion that you must protect yourself.
And, it’s true. You define how people treat you. That’s your standard to set.
When it comes to effective parenting, setting clear boundaries is empowering to both you and your child.
Negative Feelings Aren’t an Indictment
A common pitfall of parents is that they over-empathize with their children.
Perhaps your child had a rough day at school or got into a fight with their friend. So, you let them off the hook for their regular kitchen duty for the night.
To establish real-life boundaries—such as the dishes still need to be washed even if you feel bummed—teaches them that a negative feeling isn’t a punishment or big conspiracy. Rather, negative feelings are a part of life to be worked through.
Crossing Boundaries Has Real-Life Consequences
At some point, another person will cross your boundaries. Your children may even witness it, observing how you respond.
Setting clear boundaries means knowing yourself very well. After all, you can’t teach them to know themselves and set boundaries when you haven’t effectively done it yourself.
To do so, it’s critical to show your kids that crossing your own boundaries has real-life consequences. This may mean a verbal reprimand or no TV. Regardless, consequences speak volumes and are at the heart of effective parenting.
Great parenting requires a lot of simulation. You ultimately want to teach your children skills, like boundary setting and respectful communication, so that they use these skills to succeed in the real world.
If you’d like support in your parenting endeavor, please reach out to us.