1. Get Your Game Plan Together
Firstly, it’s vital to get on the same page as your partner. Be sure to talk with them outside of an argument as well.
Settle on things like:
How you will each discipline the children
Who will do what household chores
The amount of “alone time” spent with biological children
Your financial strategy
What boundaries you’ll place on the extended family
To successfully blend a family, you must first create a healthy relationship between the two of you. You’re the leaders of your family, so being a united front is imperative.
More than just presenting yourself as united, do your best to come to an agreement on important topics. Your unity will serve as the foundation for new rituals of connection.
2. Avoid the “Replica Pitfall”
Your new blended family isn’t simply a replica of your family with your former partner. Neither is it a “do-over” or a “try number two.” Your blended family is simply a family, regardless of what may have preceded it.
So, don’t try to re-create the family you tried to create with your ex. Doing so will reap havoc on your relationship with your current partner and any children involved.
Rather, take the time to properly grieve your old family. Let your previous dreams be put to rest, allowing new dreams to come to life. It’s okay to be sad that you don’t have a traditional family. Give yourself the space needed to let those feelings move through you. Embrace the new opportunity to create rituals of connection with people you treasure.
3. Embrace the Small Wins
If you ‘re already a parent, you know how valuable those daily minute interactions can be. It’s in these small moments children tend to reveal their heart the most. On the car ride home from school, cleaning up before dinner, or running to the grocery store with you for a last-minute item can all serve as enormous windows to form a connection.
Rather than planning big outings or events, embrace the small moments. Furthermore, make it a point to be kind and thoughtful.
Families don’t always blend together flawlessly like butter and jam. And, you may not fall in love with each other as quickly as you’d hoped. But steady the path. Little moments can add up quickly, forming the glue that you desire.
4. Establish a Regular Rituals of Connection
Although you may dedicate yourself to bond through the everyday routine, remember to add a regular little spark. As mentioned before, creating rituals of connection doesn’t need to be an extravagant production. Yet, it’s important to establish new family traditions with your blended family.
A weekly pizza night, a family game night, a monthly family outing, or a holiday ritual that’s unique to your new family to name a few. These would work as new traditions. Plus, they’re events that support bonding time.
The theme is more about making it a regular happening than on the actual event. Setting aside time for your new family lets them know that they’re important to you.
If you’re ready to create new rituals of connection for your blended family, I would like to help. Please, contact me today. Or visit here to learn about how I can support you and your family.